origin of human (male)
A dominant phenomenen in the world of today
is the inability to surrender*. After the echec of organized religion - revealing
themselves as hollow, superficial and oppressive - people are increasingly "thrown
upon themselves". Countless factors contribute to further alienation from life. The
socio-ecoconomic system is taking advantage of it by (even more) pushing people into
addiction. The virtual world appears to be a "devouring monster", destroying
individual and community life. The family doesn't function anymore as a safe haven, a
place of wholeness, balance and regeneration.
* Apart from "surrender" to
the new religion of consumerism....
The psycho-dynamics can be further
elaborated. In order to surrender yourself to the Greater Whole - a core characteristic of
true religion - basic trust is needed. In an distorted society e.g. family life, like we
have today, children feel increasingly insecure. They cannot trust their environment,
anymore. So they are looking for overcompensation. The first option is a "strong
ego". You vow to yourself, that you will never be depending on anything whatsoever,
anymore. You start cultivating a philosophy of independence, strength and success. You
have to become a "winner".
You are not a natural winner, though. Deep
down here is this fear of being weak, to be at the mercy of circumstances. Hence, hating
weakness being the other side of the coin. It is a frightening picture.
"Winners" cannot allow themselves to feeling compassion. It sometimes becomes
the foundation of an entire nation. Society just consisting of "winners" and
"loosers", the former deliberately trying to destroy the latter. It is the
beginning of barbarism and the end of civilization. Insight into the underlying mechanism
is crucial. Actually, the "winners" prove to be the "loosers".
Now, what this has to do with the
"mother-complex?" Is there any? We just left the authoritarian father-complex
behind, only to become replaced by its counterpart? The paradox is, that despite the
disappearence of the father, society has become (even) more brutal. Where does this
ruthlessness come from? Children increasingly depend on the mother, only. How can it be
explained, that while growing up in a "feminine environment" - with
corresponding values like inclusiveness, care and love - many (boys) go astray in later
life, leading to "white man's supremacy?"
It is a disastrous combination of emotional
and social factors. Let's take a "healthy family" as a starting point. Unlike
girls - who can identify with their mother until puberty - boys at a very early stage of
life "discover", that they belong to the "opposite sex", with the
corresponding necessity of separating themselves from the caring mother. He is different,
hence has to become "independent" from her. Even, if being raised in a loving
way, this need for separation can be (easily) felt as a rejection. "Being thrown out
of the nest", the boy will blame the mother for it, giving raise to not only feelings
of abandonment, but also (deep) resentment.
The boys' growing identity thus depends on
"being different"*. In fact, having been "thrown out" supports his
determination to "become somebody". Dependency (on the mother) is undermining
this effort. It is a inner conflict: On the one hand feeling this need of being cared of,
on the other the fear of "falling back". The mother becomes an obstacle to the
developing ego. In dreams, deep fears of being devoured by the dark womb illustrates the
fact, that this is serious stuff. Actually, "falling back" (into the mother's
realm) is the foundation of existential fear. Not surprisingly, that it affects men more
* A "strong" personality and
denial of the mother being two sides of the same coin....The formation of the former
fueled by fear.
As said above, developing "a strong
ego" being only one option. It is reserved to children, who's (mind)vitality is
strong enough to go their own way. Many aren't that strong, though. They
"prefer" to remain under the care of the mother. "Mother's children".
However, their situation isn't black and white. Even "weaker boys" want to
become "strong men". They compare themselves with their more successful friends.
Hence, they will suffer from a permanent inner struggle. Because they cannot actualize
their desires in the real world, they start projecting them into dreams. Unhindered by
reality, these kids' dreams do not encounter any limits.
With their underlying powerlessness as a
major drive, these dreams very soon become dominated by power obsessions. The boy wants to
be the greatest, the fastest, the most succesful, the winner, the richest or.....the
"terminator". He wants to overpower others. In dreams anything is possible. It
is reflected by society, consisting of the same mechanisms: all those boys who "were
before you". Inner and outer thus coming together, fusing in one megalomanic
universe. A "dream state" of an immature boy-collective, to whom "anything
is possible"...... except living in a self-regulating, balanced and mature world.
This dreamworld isn't an innocent one. The
fear of falling back is the cause of being obsessed with "looking forward", the
flight into the future. It is the engine behind "progress",
"expansion" and "profit", even "creativity". It is the
driving force behind capitalism. Its essence is to escape from the omnipotence of the
mother....A main characteristic of male chauvinism is to deny its origin. Myths like
"Orpheus and Eurydice" illustrate this. If Orpheus would look back to her, he
will be doomed to die. Of course, this is exactly what happened. The same way,
"our" CEO's greatest fear - nay panic - is stagnating "growth
The boundless innovation drive behind science
and technology can be considered as an obsessive mechanism to replace the natural world of
the mother. Unconsciously or consciously, it seeks to destroy "her world". It is
a revenge. Mother's omnipotence has to be replaced by men's "omnipotence".
Hence, the "ideals" of technology to create an entirely artificial world.
Destruction of the natural world, therefore, doesn't arise any compassion from those in
charge. Creating a "new world" is the only thing, that counts. Unfortunately,
more and more women participate in this rat race.
It will be clear, that, in circumstances that
are less favorable, the consequences are even dire. As is the case nowadays with all those
families, that are on the brink of collapse. It is mostly the mothers, who have to face
the consequences. Not surprisingly thus, that they cannot cope with the immense task of
combining raising her children, having a job and managing the household. Effects,
described above, will only become more negative. Children will feel totally abandoned,
neglected or oppressed, becoming easy victims to the destructive outside world. A vicious
circle, indeed. We have to urgently search to reforming gender relationships.
"To follow your dream" isn't
necessarily a proof of a mature mind. It can be a symptom of an ego, that totally went off
the rails. In fact, ego is a condition of being blown up. Having cannot satisfy the lack
of Being, the former remaining unfullfilled, craving for more, more and more. A system
dominated by craving for more is doomed to commit suicide. Contrary to the ego's greed,
the earth's resources are limited. The environment thus confronts us with our deepest
obsessions. As said above, it is the underlying fear, that drives us crazy. Sooner or
later it confronts us with the "object" of that fear: the primordial maternal
A great deal of pain, fear and hatred can be
easily reduced to a "mother-complex". It is a fact, that in societies with a
tradition of mother dominance, the males have problems with developing a healthy
aggression. Its caricature are all those Japanese men, who (after a frustrating night...)
in the morning underground, obsessively read their sadistic comic books, torturing women.
The women (mothers) are punished for "what they once have done to them". It is a
well-known fact, that many dictators (Napoleon, Hitler, Stalin) had a dependency
relationship with their mothers. Their crimes serve the purpose of proving their maleness.
So, how to find a way out? Obviously, men
cannot go back to their (biological) mothers. What is left is therapy. Covering up those
parts, that have been rejected, denied or suppressed. Today's therapies are highly
individualized, though. Their concern is personal wellbeing, only. They don't care about
the overall (spiritual, cultural) problem, beyond. On the other hand, our entire culture
is suffering the consequences of human (male) derailment. Hence, we are forced to looking
beyond individual interests, alone. We have to go deeper, in order to look at the roots of
Reconciliation with the mother, obviously, is
the solution to our problem. To acknowledge, cherish and embrace your origin, that's where
it is all about. This can be achieved on various levels. To reconcile with your own mother
is a necessary thing, however, considering the crisis we are in, not enough. Remember the
root cause of your problem: fear of falling back into the womb, into blackness,
nothingness. It corresponds with the Cosmic Womb, in which we all are embedded. Our fear
appears to have a cosmic dimension. In ancient times this was called The Great Mother as
the Source of death, permanence (web of life) and rebirth.
This is called the "Law of the
Universe", meaning that all levels of existence are ruled by it. In order for life to
flourish, growth should be balanced by destruction. Looking at nature, we only see cyclic
processes. In our bodies 25% of cells are in continuous decay, 50% are relatively stable,
while 25% is renewing itself. The surprise is, that those perishing, secrete substances
that stimulate the growth of the new. Death being a "conditio sine qua non" for
new life to sprout. In case cells are prevented from dying - as a result of overeating,
suppressive medication etc. - renewal retards.
It is exactly this natural cycle, that is
denied and suppressed. Our technology-dominated society has created an illusion of an
ongoing, never-ending linear progress (originally introduced by Christianity....). This
obsession with the future prevents us from living in the HereNow, to enjoying life. It is
the cause of personal and collective stress, fear, anguish, depression and burn-out. The
paradox is this: by denying "death" (overcompensating it through unlimited
growth) we will eventually die. The megalomaniac "will to live" proves to be
morbid. It is denying other equally important aspects of life.
In order to survive, we have to restore the
existential balance. We have to become part of the Mother's Law, once again. It is the
spiritual meaning behind to "returning to the Mother". Realizing that She is the
Vessel of Regeneration, we are invited to give up our ego's in order to become reborn as a
New Self. It coincides with overcoming our existential fear of "falling back into the
womb". Hence, our healing process to be on several levels simultaneously:
spiritually, culturally, psychologically and relationally. The Mother, once "the
cause of our suffering", proves to be our Redeemer.
For problems with the womb, only the Womb can
help you. The Mother being the answer to the mother-complex! Sooner or later you have to
confront yourself with Her. She will reward your efforts, not only in becoming a mature
balanced person, in harmony with your environment, but also in that She may pour out Her
Light Body to you. Enlightenment through Grace! This time it is not effort e.g. ambition,
that brought you there, but deep trust in Her limitless Compassion. Hence, your attitude
being that of gratefulness, praise, worship, joy and a carefree life.
However essential, taking refuge in the
Mother is "not enough". This new orientation to life has to have its
consequences on other levels, as well. Gender-roles have to become re-defined. One
solution lies in women, joining together, forming "tribes", sharing tasks and
responsibilities with each other. The role of men is practising solidarity with the group,
while serving the whole. In a patriarchal society, emancipation of women (and men!) is an
illusion. Hence, the entire society has to be reformed, as well. Against the background of
a degenerating culture, the emphasis has to be laid on restoring the self-sovereign
In a society, that is increasingly
degenerating, new forms of solidarity are simply a matter of survival. In order to achieve
that, we have to only adjust to an already existing trend. This includes women, who
distance themselves from monogamous marriage, raising their children themselves. Sometimes
they have children of more than one partner. These women should seek solidarity with other
women, establishing the core of "extended families". Subsequently, the
partners/boyfriends should be "invited" to take collective responsibility. This
benefits both sides. Women and children will be protected, while the men will discover new
forms of cooperation among each other*.
* This model can be subsequently
extended into the "higher echelons" of society. The result being a new
community, based on self-determination, subsidiairity and cooperation. See: Transformation Manifesto for the 21st century (German/Dutch).
Returning to the beginning. Instead of an
immature regressive "returning to the mother", the entire culture is in dire
need for The Great Mother as its Savioress. Lots of (mature) courage is needed to embrace
Her Law of the Universe as the (new) foundation of life. Psychologists like E.Erikson,
C.G. Jung, M.Buber and H.E.Richter all stress it. F.i. the first emphasized, that Gandhi
received his power to resist from the fact, that he derived it from the elementary power
of the Mother. This gave him a limitless feeling of security (German:
"Geborgenheit"), reason why he was able to overcome the most dangerous
We aim the same with reviving the tradition
of the Green Man e.g. Wise Woman. Only by returning to the Source, we will be able to
Healing the Planet.
Praise the Mother!
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